Thursday, February 20, 2014

Online Dating Stories {2}

Hey friends! So I'm back at it with another email from a wannabe suitor from If you want to catch up with the first installment of this, read here. Basically, I'm gonna share with you guys these pretty entertaining emails from guys on match. 

So, let's see...this one didn't spell my name wrong, in fact he didn't even address me which is totally fine. The very first thing I see while scanning this email is a TON of questions. I feel like this guy is interviewing me or something. Am I supposed to break down each question for him or something?! Sorry but ain't nobody got time for that.

A little tid bit, he should have probably just started off with his bio and then maybe asked 2-3 questions related to me. Just for fun let's break down the questions here and I'll list how I wish I could have answered this (but I'm a semi nice person and I just ignored his email).

How is my week so far? 
Fan-friggin-tastic I suppose (what's the right way to answer this?!)
Have you had any luck on here?
If I did, would I have been active in the past 24 hours?!
Are you finding many keepers or just creepers?
How many "keepers" am I allowed to find on here?! Is it creepy that you're asking if I've met creepers, I dunno you tell me?!
What are you looking for in a relationship?
Wow, you just jump right in don't ya? Well if you maybe took as much time as you did to compile this email to read my profile, I'd inform you of the type of person I am looking for...
What qualities or traits are you looking for out of a boyfriend?
Wow, again already jumping to the boyfriend wagon? Ballsy. Well, again, if you had read my profile you would know the answer to this...

I know I may sound pretty mean, but these were my serious thoughts. Nothing in this email was specifically personalized to me or my profile, meaning he probably didn't read it at all or just skimmed through that. I'm sorry, I took a lot of time to write my profile out, so instead of just looking through my pictures and jumping to email, check out the profile and my interests first. It's there for a reason. 

Some other things I wanted to point out about his email. He's a "big foodie", but didn't list any fave foods, just that he's a big fan of beer and wine. As much as I would like to believe you can count wine as a food item, that is a beverage sir, hope you have some food with all those beers and wines you're drinking.

Then there's his header Business by day, fun by night. I'm sorry, this is the impression you want going along with your picture? Ya sure, mine isn't that creative, but it's a quote that I absolutely love and I think it describes me, which is technically what the header is supposed to do. If it's not something that describes you, at least make it funny not cheesy and corny. The rest of his profile is just about that bad...if you look at the short bio up in the picture, you can see him comparing himself to a bloody OK! I didn't know being in a suit meant you were a politician, James Bond, Michael about just a guy in a suit??

Ok I think I've bashed on this guy enough for one post...sorry dude.

What are your guys' thoughts, weigh in below!

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  1. Good for you for having your guard up, and not being willing to accept nothing but the best. You saw through the fact that he probably skimmed through your bio, and someone worth your time would take a few minutes to see what you're about instead of just sending a ton of questions that he probably copies and pastes into everyone's messages and waits to see who replies.

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